11 Years Later, The Witcher 3 Still Has Gaming’s Greatest Line Ever


While the Geralt of Rivia from the original novels is actually quite loquacious, the Geralt we meet in The Witcher 3 (and the previous two games from CD Projekt RED) is decidedly more taciturn. This Geralt, brilliantly played by Doug Cockle in the English language version of the open-world RPG, doesn’t open his mouth a lot. But when he does? You just know he’s going to come out with a belter.

Here are just a few choice lines from our hero over the course of The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt:

  • “You smell wonderful at this funeral.”
  • “You’ll feel the invisible hand of the market slap you so hard, you’ll not be able to sit for weeks.”
  • “Hatred and prejudice will never be eradicated. And witch hunts will never be about witches. To have a scapegoat — that’s the key.”
  • “Don’t blame yourself. No witcher’s ever died in his bed.”

Just a few of my favorites, and it’s why I can’t wait to see more of Geralt next year. Although all of these great lines pale in comparison to the greatest line in The Witcher 3, which also happens to be the very best quote in all of gaming. This is not my opinion, it’s fact. It is just my opinion really, though.

The Witcher 3’s Geralt Is The Ultimate Poet

Lambert gets absolutely rinsed

There’s a quest around half-way through The Witcher 3 (assuming you’ve stopped playing Gwent long enough to follow Ciri’s trail) in which Geralt embarks on a mission with fellow Witcher Lambert. The pair must travel to the Circle of Elements to gather the energy required to lift a curse and, as a result, pinpoint Ciri’s exact location so they can rescue her. It’s high-stakes stuff, which makes this particular scene so delightful.

Geralt and Lambert are traveling by boat across a vast lake, when the fog begins to creep in. Geralt decides to pass the time by sharing a limerick he’s been working on, and it goes a little something like this:

“Lambert, Lambert what a prick.”

A beautiful poem, I think we can all agree. Even in isolation, this is one of my favorite quotes in any game ever. It perfectly sums up who this version of Geralt is: a man who uses words rarely and to great effect. The entire scene is, of course, perfect — especially because of Lambert’s two-word response to the recital.

While we all know Ciri will be the star of The Witcher 4, I sincerely hope we get to spend a fairly substantial amount of time with Geralt, even if he isn’t a playable character. After all, Ciri will surely need advice from her dear old dad and — with any luck — a limerick or two.


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Systems


Released

May 19, 2015

ESRB

M for Mature: Use of Alcohol, Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Nudity, Strong Language, Strong Sexual Content

Engine

REDengine 3

Cross-Platform Play

yes

Cross Save

yes

Expansions

The Witcher 3: Hearts of Stone, The Witcher 3: Blood and Wine

Franchise

The Witcher




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